They Played the Bejeezus Out of That Pole

And once again, Taiko rocks my world!

I happened to mention that I liked that drumming arcade game again. It was three weeks ago, at Arao #3 Junior High, and my comment was followed by an invitation from one of my all-time favorite seventh graders. I like this kid because he carries his energy wherever he goes, including right into the classroom. I wish he would come along with me to every class in every school, but then I'd have to pay him, and he's sort of young for a regular job and all. Anyway, he told me he liked to do Taiko drumming and invited me to come and watch his group performance in a few weeks. I thought it sounded cute--a bunch of seventh graders doing Taiko on a stage.
And today rolled 'round, I'd forgotten the performance date, and at 9am my lovely tutor calls me this with a couple of free tickets to the show!
I think a lot of people have seen Taiko on TV, like me, but I didn't really expect it to be like it was on TV, with all the glory and intensity. I wondered if it was a production put on by the area middle schools or something.
The great sloping hall of the Arts Center probably holds seven or eight hundred people, and the place was full to capacity. I ended up sitting next to three of my former students from Arao #3, and we exchanged the standard, "How are you?", "I'm fine, thank you. And you?", only to be interupted by the incredible sound of 'PONG PONG PONG PONG'; the big bass drum captured our attention.
Taiko is not just hitting a drum. Taiko is a full experience of movement, color, sound, and energy. Every strike comes with intention, from the mind and the body. The drummers struck the drums and moved from side to side with every strike, their stance deeply wide. Their arms moved so graciously and furiously, shooting up after each hit, all the way up, seeming to point towards the heavens! As the rhythms became more and more complex between the various performers on stage, the stage lights shone new colors forth onto them and their background. The performance went on, strikingly, flawlessly, and every new group that would come out to take the stage would have a different set of costumes. The sets were varied yet simple, the colors were always subtely different and therefore refreshing to take in. The show was dynamic and professional throughout, even when these teeny little kids(maybe around 5 or 6 years old) were on stage, banging away with the rest of them. It was again amazing to witness the concept of talent education(a concept brought to the west by Shinichiro Suzuki, founder of the Suzuki method for stringed-instrument players) brilliantly at work. This concept says that every child has talent, and with the proper support structure, all children can achieve success.
Now, I didn't mean to skimp on the part about the adults, the ones really drove the show home. Their skill was apparent even before they started twirling their sticks in the air and adding complex steps and body movements as they played. All in all, there seemed to be about seventy-five members of the group. They finally all took the stage for one big(and actually real, not like in the US, where it's just expected) encore. A gargantuan bamboo pole was lowered across the front length of the stage, and while the adults and young adults played the drums on the back part of the stage, the kids lined up and played that bamboo pole with fury. It was a spectacular encore.
Needless to say, I got a lot more than my money's worth out of this one. Of course, since I didn't pay for it at all, that isn't saying much. ; ) But I mean for it to say great things, actually. The show genuinely blew me away, and seeing that little seventh-grader up there on the stage, the head drummer of the junior students, giving it his blessed all, brought tears to my eyes.
This has been an interlude, brought to you by life itself. It has been an intermission from the job-saga, which will continue to unfold at another meeting with the Board of Education tomorrow...

Total Plutonic Reversal

What can I say? Life happens. They've decided to cut my program next year. I can't renew my contract.
I've known for some time that the city of Arao has been having a financial crisis. That's why they cut the program down from two people to one person in this last year(which is why I'm so busy in school; I do the job of two people). But as it happened, today, the day after I decided to stay on for another year, the Board of Education met with me to tell me they're axing the JET program in Arao due to lack of funds.

It took me about ten seconds to absorb this life altering piece of information.
Summary of emotions felt; Surprise, momentary confusion, relief, stress.
I say 'surprise' and not shock because I'm coming to accept that life is totally out of my control.
And the relief came before the stress; no more Wednesdays at elementary school. ; )
And why the stress? The sudden uncertainty of what comes next.

I searched in my briefcase and found my thinking cap. I dusted it off, put it on, and threw these thoughts onto the table:
Does that mean I have to move out of Arao in July? Answer: Most probably yes.
Does that mean I have to move back to the US in July? Not necessarily.
What are my options??? (They'll have to get back to me)

Immediately after the meeting I got on the phone to my prefectural advisor. Blast it, she wasn't available. I need to know my options. I have two weeks to decide what to do.
Here's what I think they are: the first possibility is that I move to another town within Kumamoto Prefecture(a prefecture is made up of several cities or towns, like a county). Sounds, well, not thoroughly appealing. If I have to move, I want to make it worth the tremendous effort that moving can be. What sounds more appealing is that I might have a chance to transfer to another part of Japan, and live there for a year. As you know, I was planning on staying in Arao, but as long as I can't, maybe I can get a chance to experience life in a different part of Japan!
Of course, the option still remains to return home. This is not such a terrible option either. I could do some traveling after I return, as I'd planned to anyway, and I'd certainly enjoy coming back to Boulder.
It's cliched, but they handed me a lemon and I'm going to make some sweet, refreshing lemonade--ahhh!
So, I'm just waiting on that call from my advisor. She'll give me the beef and then I'll decide what to do next.

I've been banking on the words of Albert Einstein this entire year:
"In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity."
We'll see if ol' Albert really knows what he's talking about.

Six months in Japan today

How long is six months? It's long enough to have begun the journey.

My recontracting decision is due in less than two weeks. That means I have to decide whether or not I'm staying for another year. On the surface, it might've appeared that I've been ready to leave for a while. Yet, that's not the entire reality of it.
Since I came back from Philadelphia, something's happened to me. It makes me want to stay.
If I can blame this on someone, it was actually Honda Sensei who instigated my 'reconsideration'. I was training at the dojo in Kumamoto one night, about a month ago. We were doing some sort of kokyu-throw(movement/breath/timing-type throw). My partner was a woman who was very reserved in her style, and not so confident in her throws. Honda Sensei came around to see what we were up to, and he stopped us and turned to me. Honda Sensei has a quirky way about him sometimes, but when he wants to cut through the bullsh*t, he really becomes direct. I think he called someone over to translate, otherwise, I'm not sure how I knew exactly what he said. But this is what he said: "Why are you holding back? What is your purpose for holding back? There's no need. Train at your level."
I really didn't think too much about what he'd said just then. I just remembered his energy, and sort of accepting some energy from him; like he was giving me some energy.
After class, in fact, weeks after class, his words kept returning to me. Why are you holding back? What is your purpose for holding back? The words rang out in my head. And sure enough, I can see what his question was for. It's stupid, this game of being oneself. I give up trying to understand it. I completely give up hope.
Give me isolation; I accept it. I give up trying to deal with it all.
And so I celebrate six months in Japan today.

This being the case, my options are 1. Return home to Boulder in July, or 2. Stay in Japan for one more year.
Life choice #1: be surrounded by friends and family, rejoin the English-speaking world, play great works of music, rejoin the Aikido dojo; find a job.
Life choice #2: stay here, continue to embrace this life and be repulsed by it even more, explore and expand with Aikido opportunities, make money, and be prepared to come home to enter school in Boulder after next year.

Truth be known, I want to come home. Life is easier at home. Communication happens at home. There are many things that make life tediously difficult about living where I live. But I'm not convinced that's a good reason to leave.

Originally, I had wanted to stay here for two years. And so, I shall stay, I suppose. Even as I write it, my heart aches. But, I will survive.
(Cue disco music, while in the background, one small violin plays 'my heart bleeds for you'.)

P.S. If you are thinking to come and visit, I promise it's actually rather nice here. ; )

Naked Men and so forth...

I didn't know, after all, that they would run into the ocean.

The day started brightly. Soon after, it began to rain.
I was thrilled to be up bright and early on a Sunday morning. I was soon to head off to an Aikido seminar to break in the new year. I was greatly looking forward to seeing Suganuma Sensei again. I could hardly believe I'd been invited to a yudansha(black belt) seminar by Suganuma personally.

That's about where the good part of the morning ended. I made certain the night before that I understood the train schedule perfectly. I did exactly what I was told to do. Yet, somehow, in Japan, so far, that hasn't seemed to work out for me. I got on the wrong train. It went to the right place, only it was the local and not the rapid train, so I arrived after the seminar had already started. I was supposed to meet the group of ten or eleven people from my dojo on the train, but actually, they'd told me to get on the wrong train, so I didn't find anyone! I didn't even have a map of how to get to the dojo from the train stop!!! I did everything I could to get there. I asked for directions at the info booth in the train station. I got directions to the wrong dojo.
Finally, I gave up. I tried to maintain some composure as I poaked at a cabbage salad and dryly buttered my toast in the Fukuoka train station cafe.

I had been asked to this seminar a couple of months ago after talking to Suganuma Sensei at a party, and I was thrilled. Unfortunately, I didn't write the date down, so I promptly forgot when it would be. Naturally, I was surprised when someone reminded me about it at yesterday's practice. I'd already planned to go two festivals and have a meeting with my supervisor, my supervisor's boss, and the woman who has become my tutor. The purpose of the meeting was to promote positive communication among the staff in my office. It was to be informal, with eating and drinking. It would start at one.

So, I needed to quickly devise a plan so I could go to the seminar and the festivals and the meeting. I resolved to go to the first part of the seminar and skip the rest to come back for the meeting and so on. Well, as I said, I decided to give up on getting to the first part of the seminar and got on a train to ride two hours back to my town for the meeting. In the middle of the ride, my supervisor called to cancel the meeting. It was too late to turn around and catch the last half of the seminar.

Therefore, in light of the fact that my whole day had turned to crap, I went to the Naked Man Feast. Fest, that is. ; )
The men actually donned white loincloths, and they gathered at a very special shrine for the purpose of purifying themselves and blessing the town with good health and good fortune in the new year. They held fast to each other in a circle facing inward, about 30 men, with one man in the center hoisted on the shoulders of the others. They chanted 'Wa-soi, Wa-soi, Wa-soi' in rounds, as the man in the center urged them on. Firemen and police officers surrounded the ball of men as they swayed back and forth, sometimes into the crowd. It was pretty dangerous. One man in a loin cloth, with blood smeared across his chest staggered past me, apparently crushed by the unsteady mass. After inquiring, I learned that the men weren't drunk. They were cold.
People from the outside were tossing buckets of cold water onto their bare skin. Some of the men looked dazed, as steam rose from their bodies. But they kept chanting, and finally I could see that the man in the middle was holding something. I couldn't see what it was.
The pack started moving down the street, taking directions from the frigid man on top. Soaked and shivering, some with purple lips, they made their way through the tiny streets of the town, maybe four or five blocks to the Ariake Sea. Then, as simple as that, they ran in! It was probably 35 degrees Fahrenheit out at the time, and an icy rain was again starting to fall. As they shouted and danced around, I could then see what they were carrying. It looked like a straw target. Someone said it was the seat of the local deity, moved to the town from a neighboring shrine over four hundred years ago(I doubt it was the original cushion of the god! : ) ). The seat represents luck and strength, I was told, and it was the mens' job to safely carry it to the ocean!

Then, I got my picture taken with some of the naked men. : )

Bummed out that I missed the seminar, but so happy to have witnessed yet another angle of the complex Japanese cultural mobile.

Tomorrow it's back to school again. Tuesday is my last day at Arao #3 Middle School. I'm looking forward to moving on. There seems to be some stale air at #3. Thursday I start at #5...

Fourth Graders are from Heaven

Had another six-class elementary school day on Wednesday. Ended up staying at #3 Middle School til 10PM the night before trying to finish preparing. I still haven't found a way to deal with Wednesdays. Usually, there's no plan or idea given to me as to what I should teach. I generally receive a schedule about one week before class, but this week I got it the day before. The schedule tells me how many classes I will be teaching, the number of students, and the names of the teachers. It also tells me what time each class starts. Under the space for lesson suggestions, it undoubtedly reads some variation of: 'ALT(Julie) Gives Introduction, Song, Game, Goodbye'. This week's schedule read: 'We hope to play children's game in America,' and 'Please tell us that junior high school.' Uh...
I'm doing my best. We played a couple of silly counting games with racquets and foam balls in 1st and 2nd grades. 3rd grade practiced the alphabet, did an alphabet maze and played bingo. We made a calendar together in the 4th grade class. In 5th and 6th grade classes we played a card game, kind of like Memory, but speaking in English.

I usually try to come up with one 'quality' idea, and really work hard to make one class really good. I usually pick 4th grade to do it with, because I think 4th grader are at a particularly interesting time in their mental development. I think 4th graders embody the best of elementary school. They are curious and cute, but are able to hold onto concepts and work on projects as a group or by themselves. Thank iPods for the 4th grade.

And otherwise:
It's been quiet after the holidays.
Although,... the naked man festival is this Sunday; I'm looking forward to that. ; ) It's called Matobakai, and actually, the men wear loincloths. It's been freezing cold out, but I've heard it doesn't stop them from going to the shrine to celebrate. What they are celebrating is yet unknown to me.
Also on Sunday is the Dondoya Festival, where families take down the decorations that adorned their house for New Year's. They gather at another shrine, make a fire, and toss the decorations in to pray for good health in the New Year.
details to come...

On the plus side, my Japanese has really started improving rapidly as of late. Also, since I gave up caring what anyone thinks of me here, I feel much happier overall.

Letter

Hey, thanks!!  I hope your new year is just spiffalicious!!!

What other French stuff are you cooking lately?  I noticed one French restaurant here, but I almost don't want to try it.  I'm sick of having no friends.  It means I always go out by myself.
Yet, it looks as if I may have actually be getting more friendly with---dun dun duuhhh---my tutor!!  Yes, I finally got a tutor.  She's a perky, nosey, middle-aged Japanese lady who speaks English really well.  She reminds me of my old friend Joy in an odd way.  I think it's because she can be pushy sometimes, but it's in a way that is refreshing to me, so it's okay.  I'm looking forward to spending more time with her.  Maybe I can get a pic to send you.

When I was home I picked up the new Eminem CD, 'Encore'.  I have all his CDs now.  And even though I think he's vulgar, it's been really healthy to listen to him lately.  Somehow I don't feel all that isolated if I allow myself to blame the Japanese [culture] a little for my isolation.  Eminem helps me do that and feel better about myself for it.  I'm saying this only part sarcastically!

So, yeppers, I did enjoy PA a lot; I can't tell you how revitalizing it was seeing my family, if only for 6 days--except now I'm back to sitting at my desk at City Hall for this week.  It's the stupidest thing, just sitting there trying to come up with lesson plans with no curriculum, but they just don't know what to do with me while school's out, and they wouldn't dare ask me what I think!!  I think I ought to be back in my school, helping clean the place and planning real lessons with the teachers.  Argh!

Also, I just found out that after this cycle of middle schools is up, that is, when the school year ends in March, I start over again at the first middle school.  News to me, because my printed schedule had stopped after the end of March!  I had no idea I'd be returning to all the schools again.  No one told me!  I'm always left in the dark!! I haven't felt this much pent-up anger since I was a teenager--what's with all the crap they are handing me?

Weather's been cold, but not chills to the bone like Philly.  You were wondering, but no, Japan wasn't affected by the tsunami.  Do you actually prefer the cold to the T-shirts and clouds?  Seems heavenly because I'm so cold here so much of the time.  I don't even like to go outside my bedroom if I can help it--that's why I moved all the important stuff in here.  Not so good for my health though, not moving at all. ; )

The dream of Austria is still alive.  However, if I don't fly straight home first, I forfeit my free plane ride; it's just the JET rules.  So Austria will have to come after a trip home.  I'm actually dreaming of going to Aikido Camp my first week back--a sort of intensive re-entry program or something.

I just read this and think I ought to post part or all of it on the blog.  You want I should leave a sometin' out?

Hehe, you just asked all the right questions, I guess. : )

But I'm glad to hear you had a good New Year's, with the appropriate partying.  Partying here is nothing like partying there.  If the party starts smelling the least bit wild, someone gets up to leave, and pretty soon everyone's splitting.

I was thinking about the center again, you know, from Aikido.  Embodiment comes slowly, but it comes, slowly.

the gas station, the holidays and isolation

I never like to admit that I have a cold. I'll go through days of sneezes, boxes of tissues, and bottles of echinacea, denying any kind of condition, until one morning I'll wake up and the whole thing will have passed. Then I'd think "Boy, that some cold I had."

I'm currently in Japan, in denial.

Somehow though, the thought getting gas always seems to cheer me up.
As with the convenience stores, the moment of arrival at the gas station is climactic.

The convenience store:
Pretend for a moment, that you need to buy some drinking water because you discover your own tap to be somewhat disturbingly yellow. You can't take echinacea without water, so you decide to hop in the car(the compact 'Mira Daihatsu'--or whatever the case may be) and roll off towards 7-11 for a little 24-hour service. And service it is.
"!!!! IRASHAIMASE !!!!" "!!!!! WELCOME, PLEASE COME IN !!!!!"
The cashiers' vocal greeting hits you, like cupid's arrow, forcefully, unexpectedly, lovingly. You soak in the rush of it, buy your water, and leave.
[Perhaps I'll play a game someday and visit all the 7-11s in town with a tape recorder, to compare the greetings. I would award the loudest, most cheery one with an autographed photo of me, and a promise never to return to their store(take it easy Julie, drop the gun and move away from the cynicism).]

The gas station:
Simply put: it rocks. At the gas station, if you have a customer card, you are a god. You are a '-sama', a greatly respected one. No doubt, gas stations are one of my favorite parts of Japan.
I always go to the same one, if I can help it. I like the fumes, ...uh, vibes.
Okay, so they are just gas stations, but where else do you get full service, free window-wiping and every single attendant knows your name? And again, what could compare to the excitement upon pulling in:
"!!! HAI, HAI, HAI, HAI, HAI--OK !!! (Translation: I'll direct you as to where to park your car. Keep pulling up, keep coming, okay, stop!)
JULIE-SAMA! JULIE DESU! (Translation: It is the supreme goddess Julie who has come to visit us from the planet of strange-looking people. We love her, and yet are scared of her at the same time. Full service for this card-bearing stranger!)."

I'm becoming addicted to getting gas. Which brings us to the next point: the holidays. Which brings us to the next point: isolation.
It was quite wonderful to go home for the holidays. I am constantly surprised that as I grow, so my family and long lost friends also continue to grow. It's strange how I desire to pull away from everyone and everything I know. I was taught that without a reference point, one can realize enlightment. There is no reference point here, yet I do not realize enlightenment. I realize confusion and imbalance. I realize instability and fear. I realize I have isolated myself/that I am being isolated. Therefore, I like to ease the pain with a trip for gas.

New Year's in Japan:
The trip home was quite short(6 days) because I wanted to be sure to come back in time for Japanese New Year's festivities. I stayed the night with my host family, who had cooked an extraordinary meal containing 673 different fantastic dishes to choose from(I didn't really count ; ) ). Nagao Sensei, my host father, and I spent the hours after dinner drinking special thick rice wine and scotch. We watched famous Japanese people in crazy costumes sing on TV, and at 11:45PM, we rejoined the family for toshi-koshi soba, a kind of noodle dish eaten only on New Year's Eve. Soon after, we realized that it was midnight and headed off to a shinto shrine. It was at this shrine that we rang a huge bell(invoking dieties??), and afterward we went to another shrine to offer a few coins and pray/meditate for a moment. It was, perhaps, the first time I had seen regular Japanese folks acting religious.

And now it's back to being on my own. Back to work at the city hall with no work to do. Back to the drawing board. Back to reaching out, and yet again being casually and cooly rejected. Back to good food and good Aikido. Back to back with myself, with nothing but what I create. How lucky, and how meaningless!

Let's hope this year holds more mercy than the last one ended with--thinking of the tsunami. Also, let's hope this year the US government is able to show some compassion this year. Those are my New Year's wishes. Also, to exercise more. And get more gas.